


The Hunt

by Nakwrites



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 11:27:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4219956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nakwrites/pseuds/Nakwrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From the Wander Over Yonder Kink Meme - Hater loses his arm (again) and goes on a hunt to find it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hunt

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, all! I just made an AO3 account and I figured, I might as well organize all my writings on it. So here's an old fill I did for the Wander Over Yonder Kink Meme back in 2013, for the prompt: "Hater loses his arm again, and finds Wander cuddling it (asleep)." It's a little old, but I hope you'll enjoy it!
> 
> Originally posted here: http://wanderoverprompts.dreamwidth.org/418.html?thread=36002#cmt36002

“Sir, please, if you’d just let me handle this - !”  
  
“ ** _No!_** ” Lord Hater fairly screamed at his second in command. “It’s MY ARM, and _I’m_ going to go get it!”  
  
“B-but sir!” Peepers quailed. “It’d be much more effective to have the Watchdogs comb the forest to find it!”  
  
“ _Find it,_ he says!” Hater sniffed derisively, before glaring down his nose at Peepers. He absently let his left hand drift to the hole in his robes where his right arm was usually situated. “I don’t need to _find_ it, _Commander._ I know where it is!”  
  
“…You _do?_ ” If Peepers had a visible mouth, it would have been agape in this moment.  
  
“Of course I do!” Hater scoffed. “It’s…” Quieting for a moment, he concentrated on his right arm. Detached as it was, it was difficult to feel whatever it was surrounded by; but after a moment or two of squinch-faced concentration, the skeletal overlord snapped his fingers and grinned triumphantly. “It’s someplace really furry! An animal must have found it and taken it!”  
  
_Don’t facepalm, Peepers, don’t facepalm in front of Lord Hater…_ “…Ah, b-brilliant, sir. I’ll arrange a platoon to go find the animal, if you’d like – “  
  
“ _Absolutely not!_ ” Lord Hater roared. “Did you not hear me?! It’s my arm, and I’M going to be the one to find it! Not to mention slay whatever monster’s taken it!” He puffed out his chest proudly, and then turned on his heel and skulked towards the ship’s exit.  
  
“S-sir!! Where are you going?!” Peepers squeaked as Hater reached the hatch to the ship’s Exit Funnel, leading to the temperate jungle-world outside.  
  
“Oh my _grop,_ Peepers – I LITERALLY just said!” Hater complained, turning briefly from the hatch to glare at Peepers. Right after that, he struck a pose and dramatically spoke: “…I’m going _arm-hunting._ ” And with that, he wrenched the hatch open and jumped through, letting the metal door slam closed behind him and echo in the empty air of his ship.  
  
Peepers took the opportunity to facepalm liberally.  
  
\------  
  
An hour later, Lord Hater was seriously mad. Why did this grop-danged forest have to be so big?! He stalked through the thick underbrush, pushing plants and vines aside as well as he could with one arm and relishing in his foul mood. It wasn’t often that he could have a truly terrible time these days – at least, not without it somehow being related to that orange menace, Wander, in some way or another. He always seemed to show up and ruin Hater’s funk of horrible feelings at the worst times, like when he was trying to invade a new planet – and glorn forbid anybody remember the debacle during the Cosmic Conjunction… Then again, he’d also brought dear, sweet Captain Tim into Lord Hater’s life. But still – it was because of a far-too-spirited game of fetch with the little spider-beast that Hater’s arm had gotten lost in the first place.  
  
So technically, in Hater’s mind, it could still kind of Wander’s fault that Hater was in such a rotten stink of a mood. But not right now; finding his arm was more important than musing on how Wander was so ridiculously adept at pushing his buttons.  
  
Pushing thoughts of that annoying ragdoll of an alien out of his head, Lord Hater focused on his arm again. The feeling of fluffy, warm fur was stronger now – much stronger than it had been even over the past hour. He was getting close, very close... He had just entered a tiny clearing wreathed with bushes whose large leaves dragged on the forest floor, when he realized that he could feel the rise and fall of the furry body against his arm – and then he knew that he had to be only _steps_ away from his quarry. _Finally!_ Lord Hater grinned to himself and powered up his remaining glove, letting green lightning crackle at his fingertips, before focusing once more on the feeling. A little to the left… a little to the right… there! _There!_ He’d found it!  
  
“Jackpot! Come to papa, you little monster!” Hater said to himself as he found the right clump of low-hanging leaves. With a great flourish, he tore them ragged with lightning-tipped claws – and was immediately confounded by the sight they had been shading.  
  
Sleeping peacefully under the ragged remains of the bushes’ leaves, was none other than Wander himself – completely curled and snuggled up around Hater’s missing arm. Arms and legs wrapped around the appendage, he snuffled in his sleep and pushed his face into the material of the glove, nuzzling it gently. That was the only way to describe it – there was no denying that it felt _specifically_ like a nuzzle. Hater could only stare, dumbfounded, at the little scene. Of course, it couldn’t last; with the tree-filtered light finally falling on him again, Wander stirred and blearily blinked, eyes finally focusing on the warlord still towering over him, albeit much less imposingly than Hater would have liked.  
  
“…Hiiii,” was all Wander said, smiling drowsily and rubbing at one eye. “Hi, hi. Want your arm back?”  
  
“Wh… but...” Hater’s mouth moved in soundless confusion for a moment, before he finally managed to sputter, “ _How?!_ ”  
  
“ _How_ is quite a funny story, I’ll grant ya that,” Wander replied, sitting up and stretching with a long, catlike yawn. “Hoo, ‘scuse me. Anyways… Me and Syl were just settin’ down on this planet, when all of a sudden, _plop!_ This arm just drops down in front of us, right outta the sky. I knew it was yours the minute I saw it, though, so I brought it along with us to keep an eye on it. I mean, _really,_ ” and here Wander cocked his head at Hater and winked conspiratorially, “if my arms were detachable, I’d sure appreciate it if somebody kept ‘em out of trouble, y’know?” The little orange fellow winked.  
  
“…It dropped down _right at your feet?_ ” Hater said through gritted teeth. This was _unbelievable._  
  
“ _Literally!_ I think it startled Sylvia a bit to be honest, that thing was fallin’ pretty hard…” Wander blinked, registering what he’d just said. “Don’t tell her I said that. Anyways, here – “ Wander stood up, untangling his legs from around the shoulder joint of Hater’s arm, and with a quick bow he scooped the detached limb up off the ground, absently polishing it with one furry forearm as he went. When he judged it clean enough, he proudly offered it to the bony overlord. “Syl’s gonna be back soon, so you may as well take this now and get on your way.”  
  
Hater only stood, silent and confused and staring at his arm. Wander sagged slightly, concerned. “Uh… Hater? Look, if you’re wondering if it’s clean, I took a bath a couple days ago so it should be – “  
  
Abruptly, Hater gave a huge, rumbling snarl. “WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DO THIS?!” He screamed, lightning beginning to spark and dance on his shoulders and arm as he started to advance on Wander. “You ALWAYS show up and RUIN EVERYTHING! I was going to go hunting, I was - ! I was going to _slay the beast_ that took my arm! BUT IT WASN’T A BEAST, IT WAS _YOU!_ And YOU are IMPOSSIBLE to slay! Just… WHY! WHY DO YOU ALWAYS MESS EVERYTHING UP FOR ME?!”  
  
Over the course of Hater’s tirade Wander had stayed uncharacteristically quiet, clutching onto Hater’s arm and watching him with wide, spooked eyes. At his last words, however, Wander’s eyebrows pushed together. “Now, since when have I messed things up _for_ you? As far as I’m concerned, I’m trying to help you!” he said indignantly, standing straighter so he could look Hater in the eye.  
  
“Wh- HOW DO YOU CALL WHAT YOU DO TO ME ‘HELPING’!?” Hater roared. He was so mad he could barely speak. “You always mess up my evil plans, destroy my chances at getting any power – you make me lose control of my planets and, and, and – you’ve blown up my ship too many times to count, and – ! _You don’t help me at all!_ ”  
  
“Now, see, that’s just not true,” Wander said, shaking his head. “You’re not looking at it the way I am. Remember how I brought you Captain Tim?”  
  
At the mention of his pet, Hater’s eyes softened for a moment – but soon enough they were sharp again. “Yeah? So what? He just chews up all my robes and terrorizes my Watchdogs, the little menace.” Despite himself, he couldn’t stop a smile from coming onto his face at the fond memories.  
  
“But you love that about him! He’s the perfect pet for you!” Wander supplied, finally smiling again. “And then what about that time when you won the Greatest in the Galaxy Contest we put on?”  
  
“Uuugh, don’t _ever_ remind me of that disaster!” Hater rolled his eyes and shuddered, trying to forget what went down on Bingleborp for the rest of his life. It was bad enough to be humiliated in front of those preschool diaper-baby flowerlings and his own army, without having to be reminded of it.  
  
“But you still won,” Wander said, “and you won _fairly,_ which is a step down the right path!”  
  
“Well, it sure didn’t _feel_ like winning – wait.” Hater jogged what Wander had just said back through his memory. “The right path… don’t you always say that? What’s that supposed to mean?” He glared down at Wander, confusion turning into anger. “I demand that you tell me what that means!”  
  
Wander only looked back up at Hater, meeting his eyes with a knowing, patient smile. “Weeeell, if you don’t know what it means, then you just don’t know it… _yet,_ ” the fluffball drawled, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “I can’t really tell ya – it’s the kinda thing you’ve gotta figure it out on your own, for yourself. But I’ll give you a hint - it’s what I’m tryin’ to help you with. I mean, I believe that if you start down the right path you’ll end up in the right place - ! And, and speakin’ of place, I thiiiink maybe you should move a bit?”  
  
“What? Why?!” Hater shouted. He was shaking with anger again. “ _Stop trying to change the subject!_ ”  
  
“I don’t _mean_ to, I just think that maybe - !”  
  
“ _GERONIMOOOOOOOOO!_ ” With a loud holler, Sylvia suddenly burst from the brush on the opposite side of the clearing and tackled Lord Hater, knocking him into a rolling tussle with the sound of a bowling ball hitting the pins. Wander only narrowly avoided the airborne wrestlers by quickly sidestepping them, allowing them to barrel forward into the brush again. Wander took a few steps back and then watched, his eyes darting between the rustling, shouting shrubbery and the skeletal limb he still held in his arms.  
  
“Well, I guess that worked out well. If I’d have given you back, you woulda just got knocked right off again, huh?” Wander finally said, more to the arm than himself, with a bemused smile.  
  
\------  
  
Later, when Hater returned from his excursion with both his right arm and several new bruises, tears, and scuffmarks – with that particular air of sullen frustration that was simply begging for an excuse to zap some poor sap into oblivion – Commander Peepers wisely decided that it was time for his fifteen minute break before he went to ask his Lord how everything had gone.


End file.
